Little things !

When you stop showing effort to a girl, that’s when she’ll start to think that you’re not choosing her anymore, that’s when she’ll be convinced that your heart’s not in it anymore, and that’s when she’ll believe that you aren’t falling in love with her every day anymore because effort is everything to a girl. Whether you’ve been with her for 3 months or 3 years, effort is something that she’s always going to expect to see because it’s the kind of reassurance she needs for her to continue making an effort of her own because she can’t be only one trying, she can’t be the only one wanting to make it work, and she can’t be the only one giving it her all. As a man, you should always be chasing her and making her feel like she’s everything to you and no, that doesn’t mean you always have to make some grand gesture to show her that you care, but it’s the little things that win her over. Without effort, it just makes her feel like you’re bored with her, she’s no longer making you happy, and she’s just not good enough for you and a girl can only feel that way for so long until she feels like you’re not worth the effort anymore. Maybe it’s because she would make such an effort to be with you and she would like to believe that you’d do the same for her, but if you really did care about her, making an effort should be something that’s natural and it shouldn’t be difficult so if it is, then don’t be surprised if that’s how you’re going to lose her and once you do, it would take even more of an effort to get her back.

Aside

Distance

I have seen so many summers.

I waited so many winters.

Ate it, if i found food.

If not, i went hungry.

I travelled many roads.

You were never there.

Was love supposed to be like this?

We were supposed to be together in happy and sad days.

He was killed on the battlefield, i said.

He got captured, i said.

He forgot me, i said.

No one ever had any news.

You disappeared, my braveheart

You disappeared from me you left me alone.

Not only i was captured.

I fought on many battlefields.

I slept on the earth.

With nothing to cover myself.

I was so cold.

Then i was roasted under the sun.

Spent many hungry days.

Yet, i came back to you, my flower.

Unstoppable

Just after i broke up i got out on my bike i ride it so fast as i have never before so much so i was regretting for everything that had gone by.

117/kmph on a highway i fly the road was fucking broke full of potholes but still i ride liquid came through my eyes may be because i was so fast

Then came a tampo on the wrong side and it happened in so quick time the brain just decided to put on the breaks but i did not

How amazing human brains are they can take decisions so fast in so much less time

So it decided not to stop the bike and took it as a chance the chance to end the fight of this life to get away with all the events that gonna make me feel dead without dying and just escape the pain which is greater than life

In just that small moment my brain decided and when i was a meter or so away from extinction this stupid brain got a thought of my mom my brothers my friend and a girl whom with i wanted to spend my life

And again i was regretting about giving up and failing them all but it was too late no time left i was unstoppable and had a clash.

I Don’t know how but i got away from that clash it was close but not close enough to touch me

Thank god i am alive to think about that time that so little time

Ohh my love!

She loved me so much and i was such a fool not to see.

she lifted me when i was down.

she encouraged me when i was so afraid of my life.

she loved me like nobody loved me before.

she was so worried about me she did everything right and i still can’t see.

I keep asking her did she really loves me?

Now i see how these questions would have teared her adorable heart into pieces.

I did so wrong to her with out thinking.

I feel retarded not to be with her when she needed me the most.

she loved me the way she did I should have appreciated it but i never did.

Oh poor! me i did all so wrong to her and still kept her away when she was coming to me with some hope.

I couldn’t even be her healing.

I did her so much bad and she was always my well wisher how betrayed she would have felt because of me.

when nobody believed me she saw something worth in me she took my hand wrapped a ring around my finger and told me she was there for me.

Ohh poor me i know nothing about the ways she kept loving me and i kept being a D

I have so much to write but i am ashamed of me

Chaos in the end

It’s an end to the years to the days to the weeks

End of the story

The end was long it took few months just like the way it started It took few months

End is the reality end happens always

Feelings are still here

Memories will always

It is difficult painful shameful

Breaking every inch of my heart

Destroying the trust all the worst is happening

End is hurting

They say end is the new beginning not always

I said i will be with you forever

But you ended this so this end will be with me forever

Bye takecare

Bye takecare

I am going into a deep dark place

This is my heart and my brain

And i don’t know who is in between them

They keeps on fighting and blaming one of them they don’t see that i am going in deep dark place

The brain says you feel so much and now we are in this state

And heart says you think think and think so much your over thinking put us in this mess

They don’t see they don’t care and my body is loosing its strength

All systems fail i keep getting deep in the dark place

And they have only thing to say bye takecare.

Fuck

Fuck this shit i am done

this pain doesn’t seem to go

it keeps hurting and getting worst every time

everything was not made right for this to happen

its just ugly how things happened

loosing like this was not i wanted

there is nothing can be done

letting go is not easy even it look impossible

will this be my down fall

will i be normal again

if it has to go down like this then why all it happened?

then why it looked good?

why i am even like this?

Neglect

So all falls now

The dreams, hopes, patience

The sad part is to beg someone to love me the way i love them.

Every thing has a story mine is just like another heart breaking.

The blame is mine i knew that this will happen and was happening and still i neglected it.

To stay more longer with her and hoping she will say to my face what she is doing like a brave heart.

It was my mistake not every person i connect with is like me.

Wafa is not easy it is in your soul if you have it you will stay loyal to the person at dying cost.

You were nothing special i believed in you that made you special i am not a writer not a poet.

I am a men with a volcano in my heart the lava is full of emotions.

You are a liar.

You have no soul.

And i neglected it.

Negative. 

Yes i am bad don’t you dare to come to me again, this time i will hurt you worst not to the skin of your’s but the heart with the tongue.

You asked me everytime what you deserve, I said better then what you have better then Me.

Now when i am not what you have right now I ask you what i deserve.

Dose i deserve to be fooled to be lied to be broken. No i don’t.

I am bad and i feel good to be bad. You brought me to this to the world of words where i can put my anger into sentences of agony.

I use to say things to my self and gets over your torture but now i will say it to you by not saying to your face.

I said i was fine but it always hurts me I prayed to the almighty to give me a person who is afraid to loose me.

Falling in love with someone who doesn’t know how to love you is the saddest thing can happen.

Is there anything that stays loyal forever? I asked myself.